Adulting | How To Get Your Ish Together: Making Friends in a New City
I'll admit, when I moved to Chicago I had visions of The Hills, Sex and the City and Friends running through my mind. I thought I would go out once, meet the best friends ever and we'd go to brunch together, workout together, go shopping and live our lives like Bridesmaids pre-wedding drama.
I was confused and worried when it was a few months in and I didn't have those friendships yet. I realized that working, coming home to my fiance and spending weekends just with him were not getting me any closer to friendships. I decided to put in a bit more effort, go outside my comfort zone and meet some people. Here's how I made some of the best friendships in my new city, and some advice for you too:
1) Your boo's friends
Yes, my first friends in Chicago were Jake's friends. And they are amazing! Most of them are guys and I love being "one of the guys." They're the best to hang out with for a night out, a night in playing poker or going to see the latest Avengers movie. One of them is also married and I've been able to become friends with his wife, which is so nice!
2) Your apartment
One of the first new friends I made was actually in my apartment's laundry room! We were doing laundry and started talking and joking and decided to exchange numbers. We've had a few wine nights and it's nice to have a friend in the building.
3) Make old friends
One of my best friends right now is actually an old high school classmate! We weren't super close in high school, but I found out she moved to Chicago around the same time I did and we decided to meet up for margaritas and Tex-Mex. Now, we get weekly margaritas after cycle class - it's tradition - and she's one of my bridesmaids!
One of my other really good friends I met on Instagram! I had just started getting into this bloggity and DM'd her for advice. She suggested we meet up for brunch and the rest is history. We hung out almost every weekend - brunching, lunching, shooting photos and just hanging out. It was like I had always imagined it, but better because she's so real, down-to-earth and the most amazing friend.
5) Bumble BFF
About this one…I had a few glasses of wine one night and an ad for Bumble BFF popped up on my Facebook, and Jake and I thought it would be funny for me to join. So I did. I’ve never used a dating app before and I was so out of my element. But..I met a really awesome friend who I still talk to even though I deleted the app forever ago. She and I met up and talked for 2+ hours. Very thankful for her.
6) Join your sorority alumnae chapter
I totally get that not everyone is in a sorority. If you are then definitely try it out! If not, reach out to your school’s alumni chapter. Joining these groups post-college are so much fun. (P.S. If you are an ADPi in Chicago, come join us. We have friendsgiving, game nights, happy hours, etc.!)
7) Keep in touch
While I don't live near them, I make an effort to keep in touch with my close college and high school friends. They're still my go-tos and the ones I call whenever something comes up and I need to vent. Friendships take time to build but these are golden.
While I didn't find that one friendship I dreamed out, I realized that I had an amazing group of friends and through all those friendships I found exactly what I was looking for.
Dear friends, I love you all!